Enough for Today

My testimony is still unraveling, but man am I thankful for how the Lord has been weaving my life.
I grew up in a Christian household, to some incredible parents alongside four wonderful siblings. I am so thankful for family and its consistency in my life— especially growing up. I do not take the blessing it is for granted.
Growing up in the church, I wanted more... the knowledge of Jesus and upbringing that I had lent to a “seeing is believing” attitude and one that led me to a watered down faith entering high school. Junior year of high school, I spent time serving with a youth ministry called Young Life.
For a month I worked as a food server and grew so much in my confidence in the Lord alone— at the end of that month, during a break out evening, I encountered the Lord in a very vivid way. I was sitting in front of the dining hall in prayer, thanking him for the opportunity he had given me to serve for a month in Colorado when I started tearing up. The tears blurred my sight and I began to enter into a vision of the Lion of Judah. I was leaving a pit, a chimney of sorts— it was tight and dark— in the distance was the face of a lion and its floating mane moving towards me. It came closer and closer to me until He essentially kissed me and my perspective flipped. I was exiting the pit backwards looking down as the lion descended. I came out of the pit and rose higher and higher above this mound of black filth as the lion sunk deeper and deeper— His light growing smaller but not fading. I was free floating in space and then there was a bright flash waking me from my vision. So vivid, and so real: yet so humbling. Jesus reminded me of his love for me and at the same time told me that I didn’t have to live from one vision to the next, in fact, faith is believing in that you cannot see!! We serve a good God and he knows and gives what we need— not necessarily what we want.
In my time at the University of Oklahoma, I experienced loss— deep and extreme loss. Through loss, I spent a season coping in unhealthy ways. In my sophomore year I leaned into the ministry of Young Life and youth ministry. Discipling fatherless middle schoolers was something the Spirit used to speak to me in this season. At this point, one of my lifestyles had to drop: my party lifestyle or my Jesus-centric lifestyle. I was convicted and led to drop everything in the party scene— Jesus was so merciful to me in allowing me to leave such means of coping with pain in a “clean break” fashion. PRAISE HIM.
Life with Jesus didn’t mean I no longer struggled; in fact, the more I began to lean into Him, the more spiritual warfare I faced. It’s crazy how the more full of His Spirit you are the more suppressed darkness is put in the spotlight to burn up.
Jesus began to meet me in the most beautiful ways through both community and His creation. I began to seek out these things.
Post college I continued to pursue youth outreach with Young Life in British Columbia and worked with Beyond Malibu, a camp that sends teams of high school students up into the raw, untouched beauty of God’s creation. There I learned what it means to be his vessel/the humility involved, to practice his presence daily, to lead patiently and relationally.
I spent the last two summers 2022 and 2023 in Canada, and now I’m back in Tulsa. The Lord is calling me to more and He says it’s “soon”. I’m stoked for what’s to come and so thankful for the testimony he has given me and it’s seemingly random nature has allowed me to be relational with a diverse group of people. I truly see God in both community and nature, but pray every day that I would have complete faith that our Heavenly Father is capable of things far greater than any human explanation.
I’m so thankful for breath today and that we serve a God who knows us so well. He gives us enough for today and it’s so beautiful that we get to rest in that.
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